Cliff Gardner

Thursday, March 23, 2006

I guess they don't teach math in law school

My cell phone rings at 6:15 this morning and wakes me up. Before I can answer it, they hang up. My phone tells me that the call came from an east coast law school. I fall back to sleep. At 6:40, the house phone rings and wakes me up again. The following conversation ensues:

Person who can’t subtract three: Hello, this is Ana from [east coast law school] and I have some questi—

Me: HI ANA! How are you this morning?

Ana who can’t subtract three: Oh, I’m good, how are y—

Me: FINE! You know, I’m discovering more and more that there are subtle differences between the east and west coasts, Ana. Would you like to know what my favorite difference is?

Ana who can’t subtract three: *short, awkward silence* Oh shoot, you’re in Orego—

Me: You got it! Three hours! That’s my favorite difference! Anyway, how can I help you on this early, early morning Ana?

Considering that I went to bed at 2:30 the night before, I’m really proud of how witty I managed to be. While on the subject of the rest of my life, the Peace Corps interview went well yesterday. I'll keep you all posted!


  • You know you west coasters make it really hard for everyone on the east coast and in the central states to get any work done in the morning. You should be more compassionate towards us. ;) (and you know I'm totally kidding.. at least about the last part. :) )

    By Blogger Miss B, at 9:16 AM  

  • that was really rude. it kind of reminds me of, "hey mom, thanks for the early birthday greeting but I HATE YOU."

    By Blogger Ashley, at 11:10 AM  

  • wow- I don't know if I would have the guts to say that to a college admin person... Groovy : ) Simply Groovy.

    By Blogger Megan, at 12:17 PM  

  • I don't think that was very nice. You heard her, she made a mistake. Did you at least laugh it off with her, or did you make her feel bad the rest of the day? Bad T-Mac! No biscuit!!

    By Blogger Haylie, at 12:38 PM  

  • LOL that's about how charming I am in the morning!

    And work wouldn't be so bad if I could just severely hurt one of them; it would shut the rest of them up.... yeah, sounds like a plan. LOL JK!

    By Anonymous Kim, at 12:46 PM  

  • Wow, remind me to call you.. never! You hate minute wasters and east-coasters... Aboogah boogah boogah...SAY IT!! abo

    By Blogger The Assassin (burrr), at 3:40 PM  

  • I'm really glad your interview went well.

    By Anonymous zayne, at 10:46 PM  

  • I work at a place where I have to make phone calls all over the U.S. because the educators of our children cannot accurately add or read a simple order form. I ALWAYS wait to call a west coast school AFTER 12:00 noon, which would be 10:00 there. I think it's at least a decent gesture.

    By Anonymous Holli, at 3:23 PM  

  • I can't stand trying to do business with the east coast because when it dawns on you to call a company based in New York at 2 in the afternoon, they are already closed!

    I'm glad to hear the Peace Corp Interview went really well! I'll be praying for God to lead you in whatever direction He sees as best for you. What did Ana from the East Coast want? You have us in suspense.

    By Anonymous Sharl, at 7:34 PM  

  • God, this is what makes you awesome, Thomas. You're always on!

    By Anonymous Christine, at 8:36 PM  

  • Wow dude. That took some guts. I have a hard time telling my parents they need to learn how to subtract one when they call me at 0745 cause they're up at 0845.

    Have no fear, T-Mac is here!

    By Blogger truax, at 9:33 PM  

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