Why can't I gain weight when it is cold out?

Tonight I played “Mr. Coffee” in Jess’ final directing play and I think it went really well. However, the pants from my suit, which I hadn’t worn since AFA a year ago, were, shall we say, fairly snug. I think there’s some weight, pun intended, to the idea that I’m getting a little junk in the trunk. Seriously, these things were sprayed on. Anyway, I’m glad I could help J-Po out, she rocks.

Random food for thought: why is it socially unacceptable for men to pierce their belly buttons? HUH?!