Cliff Gardner

Sunday, July 23, 2006

I'm sweating like a whore in church

It's really hot in Fo Gro. Unlike Tiffanie, I have AC at my house, although that doesn't really help me a lot because my room is far away from it, so I end up sweating my ass off anyway. I've developed a few unconventional methods of staying cool during a heat wave:

--watch "cold" movies like March of the Penguins...although watching MOTP is my solution to every problem, so take that for what it's worth.

--eat popsicles until you pass out...I recommend the strawberry flavored ones.

--shove frozen peas into your pants, just like Homer Simpson did. I'm pretty sure that's how Jesus beat the heat too, or at least that's how he would have had the freezer been invented.

--buy a used jet engine on e-bay and use it as a giant fan. Be careful that your car doesn't get sucked in!

4 Comments:

  • The heat wave Finally left Nebraska. It feels fabulous when it is in the 90's now and I find that VERY odd! Good luck to staying cool. You won't have that problem in Ukraine...

    By Blogger Laura, at 8:50 PM  

  • Spend all your time in the basement of Marsh. 67 degrees down there and no one will bother you.

    While you're down there...stop by so we can play racquetball sometime this week maybe.

    By Blogger truax, at 1:25 AM  

  • ROFL! Good solutions there... Ice cubes are a wonderful solution to heat... Gotta play the "how long can you keep your hand in a bucket of ice" game, but frost bite is a zinger.

    By Anonymous munchmunchahha, at 8:01 PM  

  • I can just see you with your pants full of frozen peas --- huge (Sam's club / Costco sized) bags -- melting... and getting mushy... ummmm... yea.

    I watched North Country last night -- there are lots of "Northern Minnesota in the Snow" scenes.

    Also, read this blog.. http://nowhere-to-go-but-up.blogspot.com go down to where they are running naked in -103 degree weather...

    By Blogger Inside the Philosophy Factory, at 8:25 PM  

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