Cliff Gardner

Thursday, January 31, 2008

I still get carded too

Yesterday I was waiting outside the Internet cafe a block away from my school, hoping it would open only 15 minutes late today instead of the usual 30, when I had an interesting experience. An old woman walked slowly by and stopped, looked up at me, then continued. After a few more steps, she stopped again, turned to me and angrily started shouting. The following conversation ensued:

Old Woman: Y vas yest yroke? (Do you have a lesson?)

Me: Shto? Izvinetye? (What? I'm sorry?)

OW: *looks at watch* Devit-pitnatsit chesso. (It's 9:15)

Me: Da, ya znayoo. Ya hochy internet. (Yes, I know. I want to use the Internet)

OW: Eta ochen ploha! Esli est yroke, tebya shoit bil tam, ha scholy! Idti! (This is very bad. If you have a lesson, you should be there, in school! GO!)

Me: No Ya Ychitel! (But I'm a teacher!)

OW: *looks me up and down* Seriousna? (seriously?)

Me: Da! Ya prepadayu angleski yazik na scholu nomer choteri, tam. Ya tolka est treti yroke subodna! (Yes! I teach the English language in school number four, there. I only have the third lesson today!).

OW: *looks me up and down again* Ya tak ne dumayoo. (I don't think so)

I turn 25 years old on Monday; I guess I should take this--my apparent ability to pass as a 16 year old slacker--as a compliment. I guess.


  • Maybe if you were sporting an awesome, huge beard, it would be different...

    By Anonymous Christine, at 7:40 AM  


    I'm going to be smiling about this all day.

    I think the last time I got carded, I was about 35...I kinda miss it.

    By Blogger magic, and with love from Sam,, at 11:31 AM  

  • I was at the bar a couple of nights ago and I did not get carded...I hope to still get carded for a long time :)

    Hope the cafe didn't open too late!

    By Blogger Kourtney, at 6:41 AM  

  • So I work with this guy that reminds me of you, even looks like you. You know, if you were 30 something, in the air force, was in law school, and had 4 kids...I wish you two could meet.

    By Blogger T-Funny, at 4:40 PM  

  • What's sad is when you go to the same bars I do and they know what a lush I am so they don't card me anymore.

    By Blogger Teriana, at 9:23 AM  

  • Shame on you . . . skipping class . . . tsk tsk tsk. ;-)

    By Anonymous Lucy, at 8:44 PM  

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